I'm drunk. My head is dizzy, another 7 minutes until my last train comes. I decide to sit down on the train platform. The train platform man comes up to me:
Train Platform Man: "Mr. Passenger, please stand up."
Me: "This is the yellow safety line, this is me [behind it] so I'm OK."
TPM: "Stand now, it's dangerous."
Me: "I'm drunk, so standing is more dahhhngeruus"
TPM: "If the train driver sees you, he will be perplexed by your sitting down. Stand up now!"
Me: "You are standing in fuh-ront of the yehhhlow line-e so youre more dangerous"
TPM: "Mr. Passanger, stand up now or I will move you by force."
Me: "Whathehec..."
Train Platform Man pushes me full force against the pillar in the station, I feel my drunk back slap against the hard surface.
Me: "Youre soh frhickin annoying..." But by now the train is coming, TPM keeps his needle hands on me until the train comes to a stop and then he abruptly leaves. I stumble on to the train. Moral of the story? Swaying around near the platform gap seems to be OK but don't sit down to attain stability or TPM will come get you.
2 years ago